It’s Not What You Think It Is

And that might be the reason it’s not working.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been there: standing in the kitchen, exhausted, trying to figure out why I felt like garbage again. Despite doing everything “right”.

Eating better, getting some movement in, sleeping more, saying no to things that drain me, taking the supplements… yet, still feeling “off”. Like, “why am I still tired, puffy, distracted, like my body isn’t on board with any of it?!” kind of off.

Now I could’ve blamed myself, maybe sometimes I did. Compensated by doubling down, thinking I just needed to try harder. Figuring I probably missed something, or I wasn’t disciplined enough. Or maybe that’s just how I was wired.

But here’s what I’ve come to realize after going through enough of these cycles:

Sometimes the reason something’s not working… has nothing to do with the thing you’re trying to fix.

Let me explain.

I worked with a client awhile back. She was literally doing everything ‘right’. The food, movement, meditation, therapy… she was getting gold stars across the board for her efforts and commitment. Yet oddly, she still wasn’t happy. She didn’t “feel” healthy. But she didn’t want to give up either.

Now from the outside looking in, she really seemed to have it all figured out. Then through our sessions, something wildly relevant came up. It was small. Seemingly harmless. But it was quietly strangling her progress. The culprit? She. Never. Stops.

There was never a single moment of true rest for her, in her day, her week, her month.

Her life was full of “good” things, meaningful work, family, healthy routines. But nowhere in her schedule was there room to just be. No downtime. No margin. No pause. That was the missing piece to her puzzle, and that’s the part she worked on that ended up changing everything.

Her story hits me a bit because I’ve been that woman (still am sometimes).

Can you relate?
To doing all the things, all the time, with no time to integrate or repair or just exhale? To feel like your body’s always stuck in go-mode?

Sometimes we hyper-focus on fixing one part of our health, like our weight, sleep, our skin, or digestion, without realizing that the real disruption is coming from something outside the bubble we’re focused on.

It’s like trying to tidy up the playroom while your kid keeps dumping bins behind you. You’re making effort—but you’re not making progress.

And it’s not because we’re oblivious to the situation… but because in that particular moment we’re convinced that this is the lever that needs to be pulled. This is the ‘fix‘ that will fix it all. And it might be! But it might also be that we’re missing something just a few feet outside our line of sight.

What if the effort is right—but the focus is off?

We look at food, consider our diet, and make changes…
But forget how deeply stress wrecks digestion.

We work out harder, longer, push ourselves…
But ignore the fact that our nervous system never fully resets.

We chase better sleep and do all the things…
But never deal with the unresolved tension that follows us into bed.

We isolate a symptom.
But healing doesn’t happen in a silo.

When it comes to our health, it’s not always about doing more. Oftentimes it’s about pausing to look more broadly. Zooming out to see the bigger picture. And this is exactly what holistic health coaching is. Looking at the “wholeness” of health with you to identify and isolate what may be swirling around and poking holes in your efforts. Then, working with you to patch things up.

If you’ve been doing all the “right” things and still feel off… maybe the thing that needs attention isn’t in your diet or your routine.

Maybe it’s your relationships.
Maybe it’s your pace.
Maybe it’s in the parts of you you’ve been pushing aside while you try to keep everything else together.

Your body knows what it needs. And when it’s trying to tell you something, it doesn’t always whisper. Sometimes it shuts things down until you slow down enough to listen.